How to get your Cat (or Husband) to Eat More Fruit

The percentage of women who meet the recommended intake of fruit per day is probably not very high. The percentage of men who meet it is probably even lower. It’s most likely the lowest for cats.

One of my excuses for not eating enough fruit used to be that I am too busy to eat fruit during the day. That sounds absurd, I know, but hear me out: When you eat fruit, your hands usually become sticky. Especially if it’s juicy and ripe, right? And unlike eating a sandwich or something you can eat with a fork, it is very difficult to eat fruit and do anything else at the same time. Then, adding to the time it takes to eat the fruit, you need to wash your hands both before AND after you eat fruit…that’s two trips to the washroom. In conclusion, if I want to eat an apple at work, it is a nine-minute ordeal during which I can do nothing else. I don’t have that kind of time!

Weighing out my options, I did some brainstorming and decided that the easiest, least sticky, and most time efficient way to get enough fruit into my and my husband’s bellies everyday is the fruit smoothie. There’s no peeling, no pitting, no de-seeding…there’s not even any chewing!



Try it and let me know if it works. But just in case your loved one rejects your efforts, I have included some potential excuses he may give you; each excuse is paired with an appropriate response to help you persuade your sweetheart to ingest the healthy and delicious concoction.

His excuse: “You don’t have time to make me a smoothie.”
Your response: “Nonsense. I can make a smoothie in 55 seconds, true story.”

His excuse: “I don’t want you to go the trouble.”
Your response: “Oh, it’s no trouble at all! I made one for myself and I accidentally made too much. You don’t want it to go to waste, do you?”

His excuse: “I have to go to work.”
Your response: “I know you have to go to work, so I put your smoothie in an empty water bottle. See? Now you can take it to go.”

smoothie-to-go

His excuse: “My stomach is full of chicken.”
Your response: “We haven’t eaten chicken for a week. Anyway, it’s just liquid now, so it’s not really food. It’s like a frappuccino. You love frappuccinos!”

His excuse: “Is there spinach in it because I heard you can die from eating spinach. Death by Smoothie!”
Your response: “You don’t die from eating spinach. You die from eating poop that might be on spinach.”

His excuse: “Smoothies is chick food.”
Your response: “So is frappuccinos.”

His excuse: “I don’t have any teeth.”
Your response: “Use this straw.”

His excuse: “I don’t like cat spit in my smoothie.”
Your response: “I don’t like people who get scurvy because of the lack of fruit in their diet. No scurvy for you!”

look at all that fruit!

You really don’t need a recipe for a smoothie, but I thought I would share with you the ingredients that are essential in my daily smoothie. But you should really put whatever you like in it.

1. Orange juice or juice of any kind. The liquid helps the blender run smoothly. If you don’t use juice, that’s fine, but be prepared to stop the blender and stir the fruit a few times. Stirring adds at least one minute to the smoothie-making process, however, because you have to turn off the blender, open the drawer to get a spoon, take out a spoon, open the blender lid, stir the fruit, turn the blender back on, and repeat procedure as needed. You also have to wash the spoon. Use juice, it saves you time and work.

2. Vanilla yogurt. Yogurt adds thickness and a nice sweetness, especially if the fruit isn’t especially ripe. Yogurt is also good for you!

3. Banana. The banana ensures a creamy consistency. Smoothies made without bananas tend to have icier textures.

4. Various combinations of frozen fruits and fresh fruits. Frozen fruits make the smoothie cold, negating the need for ice, which has no nutritional value. Frozen fruit is also efficient because it doesn’t rot while it sits around and waits for you to get around to eating it. You can buy frozen fruit in bags at the grocery store, or you can freeze fruit that you buy at the farmer’s market.

5. Baby spinach leaves (some days). Spinach is packed with nutrition and only makes the smoothie’s texture a little grainier than usual. You really don’t taste it. It does turn the smoothie green though, so if your husband or offspring are squeamish about green liquids, just put it in your own.

I wasn't eating your smoothie, I swear.